A guide for grandparents

Reading to grandchildren who live far away

A reading nook by lamplight: an armchair holding a large picture book open to a painting of two night-time houses joined by a ribbon of golden light, with a tablet, two cups of tea, reading glasses and shelves of well-worn books alongside
The armchair, the tea, the same book they can see at their end

You read to their parent once. Now they're in another state, or another hemisphere, and a video call somehow isn't the same. The good news is that the thing that made you close in the first place, a story, the same one, over and over, still works at any distance. It just needs setting up a little differently.

The guide

Six things that help.

01

Be the person with the book

Grandparents who have a 'thing' fare better than grandparents who have a call. If you're always the one with a story, small children learn what to expect from you, and they come to the screen willingly.

02

Same book, both ends

A story read at a child who can't see the pictures is hard work for everyone. Having the same book at both ends, a physical copy each, or one shared on both screens, turns a call into something you're doing together.

03

Short and often beats long and rare

Ten minutes twice a week builds far more familiarity than an hour once a month. Little ones measure closeness in frequency, not duration.

04

Mind the time zones: theirs, not yours

Bedtime is the best slot for a story, but only if it's bedtime where they are. A gentle 7pm read in Brisbane is a 9am interruption in London. Work backwards from their routine.

05

Let the parent set you up, then take over

Ask the parent at home to get the child settled and the device propped up, then hand the reading entirely to you. Splitting the job avoids the call becoming another thing they have to run.

06

Repeat shamelessly

Children ask for the same book because repetition is how they build mastery and comfort. Reading it for the fortieth time is not a failure of imagination. It is the point.

“Little ones measure closeness in frequency, not duration.”
Common questions

You might be wondering.

How can I read a bedtime story to my grandchild overseas?

Use a video call where you can both see the same book: either a physical copy at each end, or an app that puts the same storybook on both screens so the pages turn together. Reading the same pictures matters far more than the call quality.

How often should I call my grandchildren?

Short and regular works better than long and occasional. Ten to fifteen minutes, a couple of times a week, at a consistent point in their routine, builds far more familiarity than a rare long call.

My grandchild loses interest on video calls. What can I do?

Give the call a job. Rather than asking questions, read a story, look at pictures, or do an activity you can both see. Shared attention on something is much easier for a small child than face-to-face conversation.

Two hills at night, each with a golden glow behind it, under a wide, empty, starry sky
Two homes, one sky, the same story underneath it
Tonight

Tonight, read together.

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